BigTime
The Red Wig
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- Nov 2, 2008
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As history is passed down from one generation to the next things tend to get embellished. What was once a port known for a fine fried flounder is exaggerated to the point where we now know it as the lost continent of Atlantis. A trading post where a man could get a fine gold chain is one-upped so much it becomes the Seven Cities of Cibola.
In sports, acts of athletic wizardry are bragged and bantered about until they become hopelessly over the top. They call it being in "The Zone". My cousin, Elroy from Bugtussle, once saw Brent Price hit 47 3-pointers in a row, blindfolded, while standing on one foot down at the Huffman! I swear to God! His uncle, Bruce from Slapout, once saw Joe Don Looney score four touchdowns in the third quarter of a game after sneaking off behind the concession stand with the head cheerleader at halftime! It's true!
It's epidemic. It's human nature. But make no mistake about this: for 11 minutes tonight The Crock Pot, Tony Crocker, was a walking-talking resident of "The Zone". If he threw it up, it was going in, and if it didn't he would get the rebound and THEN it would go in. Wayman went for 61 at the Myriad and Brent Price went for 56 against Loyola, and both records appeared to be in grave danger for a while. You look for something, ANYTHING, to make a game against Centenary matter on a frigid Wednesday night and Tony Crocker gave EVERYBODY something to remember. For 11 minutes he was Maravich. Whatever he touched turned to swish. 25 points, six rebounds and a steal. Absolutely incredible. Did he tucker out? Yes. Do I care? No. The Crock Pot was cookin'!
Were there warts on tonight's performance? Absolutely. This team can still look hideously lackadaisacal at times. Capel was so infuriated by the second half effort that he yanked the starters for a few minutes about halfway through. Being young is no excuse to be careless with the basketball. It's no excuse to try things even the Globetrotters are wary of putting in the playbook. Why not run the offense and play your butt off on defense? We only scored 22 points in the first 15 minutes of the second half but then the message got through and we dropped 17 more in the final five.
But, in other ways, it was a coach's dream game. You win comfortably, you're healthy at the end and there's PLENTY to absolutely ream your team over at tomorrow's practice. I imagine The Crock Pot will get a hearty congratulations for tonight's performance and then he'll join his teammates on the baseline while they all run 'til they puke. The price for sins as heinous as lazy play is a heavy one.
SCORING BREAKDOWN:
1st - 26 [the sun shines........people forget]
2nd - 21 [the spray flies...as the speedboat flies]
3rd - 16 [barf]
4th - 23 [people forget........forget they're hiding]
LEADING SCORERS:
33 - The Crock Pot <---- Career high......in the first half!
16 - Tiny Gallon
9 - Tommy Mason-Griffin
9 - Willie Warren
LEADING REBOUNDERS:
15 - Tiny Gallon <---- Eight of which were the offensive variety.
13 - Tony Crocker
PLUSES:
1. Tony Crocker: I gushed about the young man for quite a while, so I'll keep this brief. Last week I referenced the mathematical super-equation I came up with to gauge the performance of The Crock Pot. 25 was the number (points+rebounds+blocks+steals+assists-turnovers) me and my thermonuclearphysiomathematician colleagues came up with. If Tony comes up with more than 25 we're in fine shape! Tonight? Tony chimed in with 49. Much like the amp in Spinal Tap, The Crock Pot was turned up to 11 tonight.
2. Tiny Gallon: Short is the line for those who appreciate the garbage man. But I am one of them. I love the guys who clean up the scraps and throw in the bunnies off the glass. Tiny was tipping the ball all over the place tonight, scrounging for castaways like a sailor on shore leave. 16 points and 15 rebounds. Yet another double-double. And that coast-to-coast steal and score got Capel REALLY fired up.
3. Tommy Mason-Griffin: Seven assists against only two turnovers. I think the game is starting to slow down for him.
4. Centenery: I've got gobs of family from Shreveport (yes, I'm part coon-***), so it's always nice to see the smallest school in D-1 represent itself well. They played hard, and they had some boys who could shoot.
MINUSES:
1. Cade Davis: I'm a big fan of Cade. Not near as big a fan of Cade as my wife is, but a big fan nontheless. That said, he looked listless out there. A big fat Aggie goose egg tonight in points, steals and blocks. He'll be better in Salt Lake City.
2. Willie Warren: It was almost as if Willie was ticked Crocker was going off. It looked like he was trying to force things for a stretch. Once he slowed down a tad and set himself before going to the tin things came much easier. If I noticed how bad his body language looked then I know it had to be grating on Capel.
3. Air Jordans: Where were they? Both TMG and "Gamma" Ray sported the Retro All-White XII's against Arizona, but no Sooner trotted them out tonight? What gives?
4. The Weather: Where are we? Minot? Holy crap it's cold out there.
5. Reliance on Threes: We shot 15 threes in the first ten minutes if memory serves me correctly. Move the ball, drive the lane, get to the line. DO SOMETHING! If we turn into a bunch of Sir-Clangs-a-Lots we're going to be getting smoked on the road. Moreso than we already have!
Salt Lake City beckons! The land of tangerine trees and marmalade skies. Somebody calls you you answer quite slowly, a man with twenty-six wives.
I don't know what to make of Utah. They've already lost at home to Seattle, and I'm fairly certain Elgin Baylor's not suiting up for them anymore. But, as we speak, they just finished off a thumping of Michigan. What is it with Utah owning Michigan? Football and now basketball too. Who knows? What I do know is that if we get consistent "good" play we'll win. I also know if we give them the "bad" spurts from our recent homestand or any of our effort from Alaska then we'll probably get bashed in like Tiger's back window.
I don't know what's going to happen. That's why I'm not a betting man. But I can't wait to find out.
Thank you for your time.
As history is passed down from one generation to the next things tend to get embellished. What was once a port known for a fine fried flounder is exaggerated to the point where we now know it as the lost continent of Atlantis. A trading post where a man could get a fine gold chain is one-upped so much it becomes the Seven Cities of Cibola.
In sports, acts of athletic wizardry are bragged and bantered about until they become hopelessly over the top. They call it being in "The Zone". My cousin, Elroy from Bugtussle, once saw Brent Price hit 47 3-pointers in a row, blindfolded, while standing on one foot down at the Huffman! I swear to God! His uncle, Bruce from Slapout, once saw Joe Don Looney score four touchdowns in the third quarter of a game after sneaking off behind the concession stand with the head cheerleader at halftime! It's true!
It's epidemic. It's human nature. But make no mistake about this: for 11 minutes tonight The Crock Pot, Tony Crocker, was a walking-talking resident of "The Zone". If he threw it up, it was going in, and if it didn't he would get the rebound and THEN it would go in. Wayman went for 61 at the Myriad and Brent Price went for 56 against Loyola, and both records appeared to be in grave danger for a while. You look for something, ANYTHING, to make a game against Centenary matter on a frigid Wednesday night and Tony Crocker gave EVERYBODY something to remember. For 11 minutes he was Maravich. Whatever he touched turned to swish. 25 points, six rebounds and a steal. Absolutely incredible. Did he tucker out? Yes. Do I care? No. The Crock Pot was cookin'!
Were there warts on tonight's performance? Absolutely. This team can still look hideously lackadaisacal at times. Capel was so infuriated by the second half effort that he yanked the starters for a few minutes about halfway through. Being young is no excuse to be careless with the basketball. It's no excuse to try things even the Globetrotters are wary of putting in the playbook. Why not run the offense and play your butt off on defense? We only scored 22 points in the first 15 minutes of the second half but then the message got through and we dropped 17 more in the final five.
But, in other ways, it was a coach's dream game. You win comfortably, you're healthy at the end and there's PLENTY to absolutely ream your team over at tomorrow's practice. I imagine The Crock Pot will get a hearty congratulations for tonight's performance and then he'll join his teammates on the baseline while they all run 'til they puke. The price for sins as heinous as lazy play is a heavy one.
SCORING BREAKDOWN:
1st - 26 [the sun shines........people forget]
2nd - 21 [the spray flies...as the speedboat flies]
3rd - 16 [barf]
4th - 23 [people forget........forget they're hiding]
LEADING SCORERS:
33 - The Crock Pot <---- Career high......in the first half!
16 - Tiny Gallon
9 - Tommy Mason-Griffin
9 - Willie Warren
LEADING REBOUNDERS:
15 - Tiny Gallon <---- Eight of which were the offensive variety.
13 - Tony Crocker
PLUSES:
1. Tony Crocker: I gushed about the young man for quite a while, so I'll keep this brief. Last week I referenced the mathematical super-equation I came up with to gauge the performance of The Crock Pot. 25 was the number (points+rebounds+blocks+steals+assists-turnovers) me and my thermonuclearphysiomathematician colleagues came up with. If Tony comes up with more than 25 we're in fine shape! Tonight? Tony chimed in with 49. Much like the amp in Spinal Tap, The Crock Pot was turned up to 11 tonight.
2. Tiny Gallon: Short is the line for those who appreciate the garbage man. But I am one of them. I love the guys who clean up the scraps and throw in the bunnies off the glass. Tiny was tipping the ball all over the place tonight, scrounging for castaways like a sailor on shore leave. 16 points and 15 rebounds. Yet another double-double. And that coast-to-coast steal and score got Capel REALLY fired up.
3. Tommy Mason-Griffin: Seven assists against only two turnovers. I think the game is starting to slow down for him.
4. Centenery: I've got gobs of family from Shreveport (yes, I'm part coon-***), so it's always nice to see the smallest school in D-1 represent itself well. They played hard, and they had some boys who could shoot.
MINUSES:
1. Cade Davis: I'm a big fan of Cade. Not near as big a fan of Cade as my wife is, but a big fan nontheless. That said, he looked listless out there. A big fat Aggie goose egg tonight in points, steals and blocks. He'll be better in Salt Lake City.
2. Willie Warren: It was almost as if Willie was ticked Crocker was going off. It looked like he was trying to force things for a stretch. Once he slowed down a tad and set himself before going to the tin things came much easier. If I noticed how bad his body language looked then I know it had to be grating on Capel.
3. Air Jordans: Where were they? Both TMG and "Gamma" Ray sported the Retro All-White XII's against Arizona, but no Sooner trotted them out tonight? What gives?
4. The Weather: Where are we? Minot? Holy crap it's cold out there.
5. Reliance on Threes: We shot 15 threes in the first ten minutes if memory serves me correctly. Move the ball, drive the lane, get to the line. DO SOMETHING! If we turn into a bunch of Sir-Clangs-a-Lots we're going to be getting smoked on the road. Moreso than we already have!
Salt Lake City beckons! The land of tangerine trees and marmalade skies. Somebody calls you you answer quite slowly, a man with twenty-six wives.
I don't know what to make of Utah. They've already lost at home to Seattle, and I'm fairly certain Elgin Baylor's not suiting up for them anymore. But, as we speak, they just finished off a thumping of Michigan. What is it with Utah owning Michigan? Football and now basketball too. Who knows? What I do know is that if we get consistent "good" play we'll win. I also know if we give them the "bad" spurts from our recent homestand or any of our effort from Alaska then we'll probably get bashed in like Tiger's back window.
I don't know what's going to happen. That's why I'm not a betting man. But I can't wait to find out.
Thank you for your time.
