I'll add this then I'm going to crawl back into my hole:
This is specifically for Bounce, who I actually like and consider a fellow OU fan. Hopefully I can say this in a way that makes sense.
During slavery, one of the greatest challenges black families faced was the breaking apart of the family. Historical eye witness accounts have proven factually that black men were often force sold, away from their wives and children, into captivity on other plantations. Often, black mothers, who white slave owners were less likely to sell, were kept around the plantation to take care of the now fatherless kids, along with caring for the slave owners kids, while also filling their duties as midnight bed warmers.....
Generation after generation, for 100's of yrs saw black men ripped away from their families and sold to other plantations at the slave owner's discretion. Over those 100's of yrs, black women were forced to become very strong, dominant people. They had to fill so many roles, trying to protect their sons from the same fate their husbands got, while also balancing their other duties. The black woman became the voice of the black family, while the men were absent by force, and nothing more than sperm donors to keep the slave numbers up to quota.
Black men lost their emotional attachment to their families, and most black families consisted of a very strong mother figure who filled every role for the children. That mindset didn't just vanish when the slaves were set free. Free black men often went on with their lives as single men only caring for themselves, while most of the recently freed women chose to stay on as employees of the white slave owners. The divide between black men/women became very evident. Many of the black men who chose to try and return to their families after they received freedom encountered a different wife that they left.
The women were much more vocal, controlling, and unwilling to allow a man who had been absent for decades, to all of a sudden return and assume their role as leader of the house.
Flash forward to today, and the greatest issue I believe faced by black families is the absence of fathers/male role models. How did this absence occur?? Do you really believe black men were just born with a gene that makes them want to abandon their kids/families?? Do you believe black men are so different than other races of men that they just woke up one day and said I'm not going to take responsibility for the seeds I produced??
Of course they didn't. It is called conditioning. It is so evident if you are willing to be objective. Is is an excuse still valid?? Not in my opinion, but the reasoning is clear to me. I feel so fortunate because I grew up with a present father, grandfathers, uncles, cousins, etc.... but i remember so many black males who had no one except momma, grandma, and big sister.
Add in black men dying at an alarming rate through street violence, very unfair sentencing practices for yrs putting many black men in prison, and you have a mindset and a culture that is very hard to overcome, started during slavery, but still prevalent today.
It's easy to say slavery doesn't directly affect the black community today, but I just gave you one real proven example. You could compare it with the culture in the middle east. Why is it so hard to get men of middle eastern heritage to accept women as their equals?? Do you think they just woke up one day and said we want to low rate our women?? It is a learned mindset that has spanned generation, after generation, and it is VERY hard to break the cycle in the way they think.
There is no easy answer in the black community. The challenges don't stop there. If you research divorce stats in the black community, one of the most prevalent reasons given by black men for leaving their black wives is, the women don't respect them, they talk very down on them, and they won't let the man be a part of the decision making for the kids. Where did that come from? Add in drugs, alcohol, poverty, street violence, and now you are seeing the manifestation of decades of wrong thinking, all directly related back to the destroying of the black family.
I know this probably sounds foreign to many, but i have spent much of my adult life researching and studying this stuff because I genuinely care about why the black community is like it is today. Do I blame whites?? Of course not, but i also don't minimize the lasting effects of the institution of slavery, and oppression of my people.
I see young black fathers every day who make babies and walk away as if they have no responsibility. Trying to get them to change that way of thinking is a hard fight, because for decades, that is the way it has been, since the tearing down of the black family structure.